In a news story I heard on KRLD, a women was just a little too embarrassed (selfish?) and caused an entire airplane to divert to make an emergency landing. She had gas and used matches to cover up the odor. Other passangers smelled the burnt matches, alerted the flight crew and the plane makes an emergency landing. Approx. four hours later, the people resume their trek to DFW. So one person who is afraid that she might have an odor has caused an entire plane to divert. How much will this cost American Airlines? Not only do they do a one for two sale on the flight itself, but they probably have to offer upgrades, free fights, etc. to the other passangers. Lady, it is a biological function. Get over it, we all fart. We are not in Victorian times when women could not even possably do something as dastardly as fart. If you do not want to ‘pass gas’ while flying maybe you should think about what you eat before you fly. I know what not eat as well. If I eat it, then guess what? Biology happens. The best part was the bomb sniffing dogs that were brought on board, they traced the smell to her seat. Now all of the internet knows, not just a few people on board an airplane. The lady will not be charged, even though it is a crime to bring matches on board civilian aircraft.
UPDATE: To the woman who wanted to meekly fart on the airplane: you were on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. Jay was thinking you had too much Taco Bell. The whole world knows lady. Good job of keeping your G.I. problem confined.
YOU CAN\’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!! Son, we live in a world that has farts, and those farts have to be guarded by men or women with matches or lighters. Whose gonna do it? You? You, Mr. Blogospeer? They have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for American Airlines, and you curse the fart patrol. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That Miss Match\’s match ignition, while tragic, probably saved lives. And the exisitance of fart-extinguishing matches, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don\’t want the truth because deep down in places you don\’t talk about at parties, you want matches to work, you need matches to work. We use words like fart, lighter, matches, odor, and fragrance. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket with his own farts and enjoys the very freedom of fragrance that matches provide, and then questions the manner in which they provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a match or a lighter, and stand a post. Either way, I don\’t give a damn what you think you are entitled to.
OMG that was too funny..I actually laughed outloud, and caused Jon to wake up and turn over. Sorry Jon. Stop being so funny dammit.